I felt guilty by ruining my own test. It was so bad, I had never done a test in such a manner. Panic attack at the last minute. And what happened next was my test-result is out-of-box, it was not in my usual pattern. Right now, I am finding how to make me stop on guilt myself. To make me truly live in the moment, and to take me back to my objections in life. I am gonna resuscitate myself about how the test gives me good effects.

One: I realize to not listen to music in a high intense situation.

Don’t do an important call while listening to music.

I found out music was so affecting my mood. In early 2019, I was watching 13 Reasons Why from Netflix. In the scene when Clay reconstruct his memory when he was dancing with alive Hannah, I felt so sad, by realizing Hannah had died, I felt that this type of romanticism that Clay felt will never happen again. I realized, by watching the same scene without sound, that the dancing music, The Night We Met by Lord Huron, is the one who generated my sad feeling. And every time I heard that song, I can’t even move, I suddenly lose my ambitions. It appeared that music was so affecting my feelings.

That has been proven to be true in multiple times. I looked for the pattern of how music affects me. Here are factors that music have to have in order to generate specific emotion.

Depressed: Sad Lyrics, Exaggerate the length of every syllable, Low-Pitch, Low-Tempo.
Ambitious: Empowering Lyrics, Firm Syllable, Mid-High Pitch, Mid-High Tempo

But what I should emphasize is that when I truly conscious of my emotion, their effects can be slowed down, and just like a passing wind, you can feel it and let your body be brought or control your own body despite having to keep feel the strength of the wind.

In a high intense situation, I truly recommend myself to not hear any kind of music. Why?

The high intense situation that I talk about is that a need your maximum focus because you gotta deal with many variables in that condition, don’t let the music make you just emphasize a variable with their lyrics and beats when you need to clearly deal with all of the variables. My worse test teaches me this, I was hearing to positive and relaxing pieces of music, make me keep believing in my basic assumption of the problem, which made me fail. And these positive and relaxing pieces of music had made me forgot about the time, which made me losing five problems that I could have worked on it.

Another argument is that in a stressful situation you got to focus on yourself and the environment, recognize what makes you stress so you can deal with it precisely. Music can distract you and create an ignorance for the condition around and inside you.

Two: I realize to never believe in the result that comes from the basic assumptions without proving it.

Yeah, I agree with this picture

Assuming is one of human nature. Because our brain tends to reduce the uncertainty level of things. Assuming answers our questions about something we are trying to deal with. But you only can stick to your assumption if you don’t have enough resources to clarify premises. Because remember, the basic assumption is something that you generate by your own limited knowledge if you have enough time to do a little research but you keep stick with your basic assumption, you will be considered as non-sense by other people.

We use assumptions in our daily life because there is such wasting of time if we research everything about simple things. The assumption is no problem if it is not attached to other people’s interests. If you are in collaboration, communicate with your partners and build up a common assumption. And again, if you have time and resource to prove the assumption, y’all have to prove it as clear as possible.

You may basically suppose about anything, but you have to struggle to not make a decision without your supposition has been clarified. Your supposition is potentially most affected by biases. And people, corporations, and influencers use biases to manipulate your decisions. In other words, if you don’t strive to prove your supposition, your decision don’t base from your freedom, but from the subconscious biases. You are a puppet.

Prove it by questioning it, to yourself, to your friends, — And mainly — to experts. Use every all of the elements of What, When, Where, Who, Why, and How. Do propagations to your question and iterate them. Then, in the end, build up a new assumption that has been modified and proved. Take decision from it, and don’t ever stop to evaluate the assumption, Is it still relevant?. Then, back to the first line of this paragraph.

Three: Whatever Happen, Be Calm, and Conscious.

It was felt so messed up in the end if you allow yourself to be panic. Panic is taking the time. When you have to be focused on the problems you are facing, your mind forces you to convergent your focus to yourself but you know that you have to finish the test well. You are in the dilemma, and you order your body to keep the focus on the test, while your mind starts to giggle unorderly. You can’t build up your calm, and you potentially fail the test.

Yet panic often comes in the test, so we have to handle this. Your mind is right, you need to focus and solve your giggling minds. This giggling mind is coming in a way because your mind is realized that the amount of resources you need is not enough to solve a problem, especially the time. You ought to comply with what your mind needs, hope.

Talk to yourself that this kind of panic is unnecessary; miracle can happen anytime; if you can’t finish the problem, it is okay and you gotta do better in the challenges that come after this. You gotta make yourself calm.

Conclusion

I wrote this in intention to calm my mind. I am kinda depressed after this test and realize that I had to make myself believe that I was learning something from this failure. And I do.

Thanks for reading, Cheers ooooooooooblaaa